Being a proud Chinese, I've always loved CNY. I've always taken this festival very seriously. I'd be so happy to see my relatives all at once. And I've never really understood why people dreaded CNY.
Through the losses my family went through over the last two years, CNY has never been the same anymore. After my grandmother passed away, occasions never really did feel the same. Every year we had lesser houses to visit and lesser people around and lesser angbaos to receive...
However, my family did not let this last for long. We slowly picked up many activities along the way to bond ourselves more, despite the passing of my grandmothers and uncles. We made time to organise activities and trips so we are truly a family, not only in name but in actions too.
I used to eat reunion dinners only with my immediate family, grandmother and 5th uncle. But after my grandmother passed on, more and more people are joining my family. This year, I had reunion dinner at a zichar stall at Blk 515 with my immediate family, 5th uncle and his wife, 3rd aunt, 4th aunt and 1st aunt with their families. We took a total of 3 tables and I really enjoyed myself thoroughly.
I also visited River Angbao later at night with my sisters and my elder sister's bf. It was a first time experience for me and I really liked it too. I like to see the exhibitions about CNY, the different lightings and decorations as well as the super lovely fireworks at the end. I saw people coming to see the fireworks even though they looked really tired, some even fell asleep while waiting, hahaha. I saw families together, laughing and talking, people with really professional cameras. It was a nice experience.
I spent 初一 at my 5th uncle's house coz there weren't any other houses to visit. Everyone just gathered there and it was super fun! CNY isn't really about following the traditions anymore. I feel that as long as you're with your family, spending time together, it's really almost there. Gambling with my family is really one of the funniest things. Their reactions and comments never fail to make me laugh. And they never fail to surprise me with their loudness...
I spent 初二 and 初三 at Kukup Village with my family! It was quite an impromptu trip and my parents only decided to go at a very last minute notice...but I am SO glad we all went. Even though Kukup was kinda boring, it was not very advanced and there wasn't much activities to do, I really still enjoyed myself. I always believe that it is not where you're at that matters but who you're with that counts. Really. Just talking and laughing and spending time together, it was enough to make me feel happy.
I hate coming back from trips with the family. It makes me miss them so much. Days with a lot of laughter, zero worries and just enjoying life. I am amazed at how at ease my family makes me feel. There will always be endless things to talk about and endless jokes to laugh at. There will always be countless things to bring up from the past, stories the young ones have never heard of and the elders are so eager to share.
If you ask me, I'd say I'm really proud of my family. I will probably never comprehend people who dislike spending time with their family because I don't know how it works for other people. But in my case, I'd give up a lot of things for them. I don't ever want to miss spending time with them for fear of missing out new stories or jokes. I want to spend time with them as long as I can.
My family is made of up so many different types of personalities and yet we all blend in really well. We may be loud, probably TOO loud, we may be self-centered, we may be overbearing, we may be unreasonable (sometimes), we may practice a lot of bad habits (e.g. drinking, smoking, gambling), we may not be as friendly as you think we are, but deep down we're all kind-hearted. And I believe that is the most important factor of all.
If I had a choice, I'd want to start every life being a Toh. I'd want to be in this family forever. I cannot even start to imagine how life would be like being in a total different environment. We may be loud and crude but that's how our ancestors were like too. I love my family for who they are and I always will.
Please love your family as much as you can and for as long as you can. And always, always, always practice filial piety. Happy CNY!
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